First Post of this Year & “PASSION”

As the time is ticking to reach 12, I feel the urgent need to update my blog. Only one post this year!! Not Done!! But alas! I could not complete it by 12, and hence renamed it as “First Post of this year”, instead of “Last Post of this year”. :)

As I queried on the topics that I can write today, I saw a few resolutions for next year, few articles on how to live life, and more about how we should do what we love and care nothing about the world. Passion - they say is very important. "Follow your Passion".  And, then I remembered “Tamasha” movie, which I have recently seen. I must say I am an Imtiaz Ali Fan. And, I have liked his movies. But when I watched this movie - I was like... Not Again Man!!! It’s quite exaggerated!  To hell with Passion!

At 30, when I look back at my three decades of existence, I ask myself - How passionate have I been? Do I love my job? Am I Happy? What do I want to do with my life?  

And, the answer is - the first 10 years of your life has gone in copying others. You did what you were told to do by your parents. You did what you saw in your society.  You did what your culture taught you. The next 15 years was spent in learning and finding your individuality to some extent. And, the rest 5 years have gone in commitments and responsibilities and Love…

The answer is - "Yes" and "No". I love my Job, but I also hate my job, sometimes. There are times when I am just not in mood to work. Life is like this. Life is not always like R.Madhavan's in 3 idiots or like Ved’s  in Tamasha’s ending. I am sure, had the story been real, Madhavan of 3 idiots must also be sometimes bored of clicking those wild animals in camera.  And, Ved of Tamasha will feel bored in telling the stories at some point of time, if not always. There is no “passionate” work that you will never get tired of and never complain about. And, that's ok. That’s life.

The answer is – It is OK to do normal work and pursue your passion in the free time, whenever you get a chance. You just don’t have to awkwardly continuously feel like the way Ved does in Tamasha. 

I sometimes feel that movies like these are creating the feeling of emptiness in people. People somehow somewhere connect with these characters and indulge themselves in these characters so much that they stop appreciating the average lives they have. Being Average as a Goal may not sound good, but being average as a result is OK. We should appreciate and accept the mediocrity of life and try to do the best from our ends. 

If you're passionate about something, it will be a part of you, no matter what priorities you have. You will take out time. Tamasha's Ved could have easily figured out a way to fuel his passion of story telling without having to leave his job security in a haste. Enjoy your passion. No matter if you earn money through it or not. Remember the Games period or recess time in school, when we used to jump with joy. 

With this note, I end my blog here - Wishing all of you a great year ahead. May we be able to appreciate the basic experiences of life - through the pleasures of simple friendship, helping someone in need, reading a good book, spending some time in your "passion" , and having a good talk with someone you care about, and acceptance of monotony in life. May you have all these. Happy New Year.

PAUSE -> THINK -> REFLECT -> RESUME

As mentioned in my last post, my idea was to take a pause from writing till I really feel like writing and till I really have something to write. Days passed by, Thoughts did come,  some events did occur which were thought provoking, but the thoughts  never weaved into sentences.  As they say, to be creative, one needs to be in a state of peace. And I was restless overworked and overwhelmed - with household chores to Official  work, with chit chat at home to gossip at office, with running behind my son to running behind my progress at work. Just like I took pause from writing,  I wanted to  take pause from everything, where I could put the rat race on hold.  
But then, it occurred to me that though "Pausing" is a great idea, but until and unless you think and reflect in that pause time, it is of no use.  And elongated pause is equal to dead. 

So, I decided to take pauses just like we take naps, with a resolution to take out time to think and  reflect on the big questions of life and bigger priorities of life.

This pause helps me to take out time to tune in to my inner wise self.
And my inner wise self told me "Stop being busy for a short while and Start being the one who you came to be." 
  
And one of the magical results is this post of mine. I found that extra hour, when I paused and the time slowed down for me to think, reflect and act, so that I resume to my daily chores with greater satisfaction.

"In life, the journey should be as interesting as the destination"
  
Wanna try it for yourself? Start by staring from the window of your cab or from the corridor of your home.. Close your eyes for a minute… and there you go… into the pool of reflections...

Hmm... I Dont know

I don't know really, what to write... I scribbled something on the notepad, quite a few times and deleted it before writing it over here...

 I am keeping extremely busy these days to find time to blog. Its been more than half a year that I opened my laptop... Today, when I caught some time to login, I checked up my blog just to to wonder that its been more than 11 months that I didn't write any post...

11 months!! Before it is a complete one year of my absence on the blog, let me write something... there is lot to write, I thought. But when I started writing, I realized that the creative flow is lost  dried up so much that I am actually not even missing it. Am I writing it as part of my obsession of looking at my blog being read?? I wonder...

When you stop talking to your close friend because of your busy life, you loose touch first and finally one fine day... you are "close" just for saying sake and nothing really close remains. You miss to know most of the happenings in each other's lives... Similarly, when you stop writing, the expressions inside somehow, somewhat dies and the love for writing becomes superficial .. But then.. isnt it natural... going with the natural flow...?

I leave my post here with this amusement.. I will be back on blog when I actually miss blogging.. !

Saadda haq, Aithe rakh!!!

This song from Rockstar is one of the rarest songs, which has powerful set of lyrics with a magical musical blend of rebellious tone . Though the lyrics are simple, they are packed with a powerful punch of musical chords that show anger, frustration and hurt. Hats off to ARR's composition, Irshad Kamil's lyrics and Mohit Chauhan's voice.
(Lyrics/Meaning : Courtesy :Lyrics & Translation)

Tum logon ki, iss duniya mein
Har kadam pe, insaan galat
Main sahi samaj ke jo bhi kahoon
Tum kehte ho galat, main galat hoon phir kaun sahi (phir kaun sahi)
Marzi se jeene ki bhi main
Kya tum sabko arzi doon
Matlab ki tum sabka mujhpe
Mujhse bhi zyada haq hai
Saadda haq, aithe rakh

In this world of you people,
at every step, a human is wrong..
whatever I feel is right and say,
you call it wrong, if I'm wrong then who's right?Should I send you a request
for me to live with my own wish?
means you all have a right on me 
more than I do..
(it's) my right, put it here (give it to me)

Hey inn qataaron mein ya udhaaron mein
Tum mere jeenay ki aadat ka kyun gott rahe dum
Besaleeqa main, uss gali ka main
Na jis mein haya, na jis mein sharam
Mann bole ke rasmein jeenay ka harjaana duniya dushman
Sab begaana inhe aag lagaana
Mann bole mann bole, mann se jeena ya marr jaana

hey, in these queues,
or in credits,
why do you choke my habit of living..I am mannerless,I am from that street,
where there is no shame..
Heart says that..customs are compensation (like a fee here) for living,
this world is enemy n all belongs to someone else..
burn them..heart says..
heart says..to live by the heart, or die...

O eco-friendly, nature ke rakshak, main bhi hoon nature
Rivaazon se, samaajhon se kyon
Tu kaate mujhe, kyun baante mujhse iss tarah
Kyun sach ka sabak sikhaaye, jab sach sunn bhi na paaye
Sach koi bole toh tu niyam kanoon bataaye
Tera darr, tera pyaar, teri waah, tu hi rakh

O Eco Friendly,O saver of nature,I am nature too..
From customs,from societies,
why do you cut me off..
why do you divide me like that?
Why do you teach the lesson of truth
when you cannot even listen to the truth,
when someone speaks the truth
you start telling (giving) rules and regulations..
your fear, your love,
your praise..
you only keep..
keep them, damn it!

The lyrics say it all... The beauty of this song is that one can relate to it. We all have at some point in our lives felt that humiliation Somewhere, sometime, we all must have and continue to carry that helplessness feeling. That feeling could be due to the norms in the society, the legal proceedings, the politicians or the corruption or a dominating boss at work or even due to the misunderstandings among family members or friends. And a day comes when "enough is enough" feeling creeps in. And then revolution begins.

The Anna Revolution, the protests against the unfortunate evil night of December 16, Malala's fight for the right to education, these are just a few examples of the revolutions that took lime light. Every day a millions of revolutions must be taking place under millions of roofs all over the world. The revolutions succeed or not is again a different story... those revolutions provide a positive impact or negative impact on society is yet again a different story...

On the occasion of Independence day, I dedicate this song to all those unfortunate souls who silently weep the oppression and inner violence; who feel trapped and imprisoned, unable to express themselves; above all to women who have faced and continue to face harassment from the society who dictate and abdicate their freedom of choice.
And pray that everyone gets their Freedom; the right to express themselves freely without having the fear of being judged and to live the life with dignity and with peace.

Cooking the uncooked!

My mom always had the constant fear of how this lazy girl will manage after marriage. "What will you cook and how will you, if you don't practice it from now??". I argued with her that cooking is not any rocket science... all the recipes are a click away in youtube...

Post marriage, life was easy with cooking (thanks to joint family).. I always had a guide to ask.. "Bhabhi, kitna pani?, kitna namak? Shall I switch off the stove now?".
And I was feeling.. "Look! How simple it was! You just need the steps.. and anyone can become chef!! :p"

The day soon came when I had to make food all by myself when both my Mother-in-law and Sis-in-law were away.  Woke up with the thought that will make rajma for tonight. Read newspaper leisurely. Took bread and butter,while munching it, watched the video on youtube on how to prepare rajma... "That was simpler than I thought", I thought. While going towards kitchen thought "Itni bhi kya jaldi hai... let me talk to sis". While talking to her, she told me rajma recipe without asking for it.. I said "yes I know.. I just saw it in youtube" with heights of over confidence. After the call, kept the soaked rajma in pressure cooker to boil. Kept on waiting for whistle. "What's wrong! Why the hell it is not giving whistle... anyways let me prepare the curry while it gets boiled". My curry was prepared, but the bloody cooker didn't give whistle. Somethings smelling wrong, I thought. House maid came at that moment and she helped me open the cooker..! "CRAP!" , its all burnt!!! :( tears were almost at the edge of the eyelids... "Rajma..." I sighed. Maid told me not to worry and rajma can be prepared without having the need to soak it overnight. Somehow, prepared rajma with assistance of the maid.... and that night thankfully everyone had hearty meal.

After more than a year now, I still am learning and now have realized that cooking and other works for that matter are not as easy as searching in google. Yes, cooking is not rocket science.. but needs practice.
Knowledge these days is click away in your mobiles... application is important. Without practice, knowledge goes useless.. and it is with practice and experience that you achieve things in life. So... my friends out there, who have the illusion that "they have good knowledge, have read many books, know about many things, are intellects, so on and so forth.." , Please take a pause! and understand that KNOWING is different from DOING , else you too will have the burnt rajmas to make you realise this. :) :p

The Mumbles inside me

Its been a long time since I wrote something.. No Diary, no posts, no notes... Nothing!
Today, I'm writing because I just want to continue writing. Feels like I lost the art of writing. Feels like I forgot how to make a diary entry...

There were too many happenings in my life in these 5 months to note down. My coming back to Delhi after 5 years, Marriage, my new family, Trip to Kerala with hubby, New boring workplace.. Some exciting things, some extremely boring things.. Some happy moments and a few brooding moments.. 
But I could not note down any of my thoughts.. because, precisely, I didn't get enough time to write down .. (Ok.. I didn't take out enough time). When you write a blog post, you have a thought that begins the process of writing, and that thought weaves on till it comes to a conclusion...  But when you have too many thoughts... that too very disconnected thoughts, how would you be able to conclude it in one post??? I have been mumbling to myself all these months, many thoughts which were forgotten soon after mumbling.

The most recent mumble today:
"Priorities change with Time" - Experiencing this itself is a kind of revelation...Revelation, that we need to learn to prioritize things and changes without changing the self completely... 
(P.S : U must have noticed in this post that my writing ability has drastically degraded.. :( I will try to keep writing instead of mumbling... )

World Peace or World in Pieces ?

September 21st is United Nations International Day of Peace. 
Be it Valentine's day, Independence Day, Diwali, Holi or any other festival or any news update, social networking sites and the blogosphere are flooded with those topics.  I was wondering that I was not able to find a single blog dedicated on this topic.. nor, did I find a single word of peace on facebook. So, thought of trying my bit to write about it. I wanted to write about it not because I have so much to say about it and not because I have done something so good on this day to share and not because I have some ideas on increasing peace or anything like that... The only purpose of writing this post is just to spread a simple word thought of *peace* within my limited scope of this blog... because praying for world peace has to be a collective thought, to give it strength...


"Peace" has been a very common idea for most of us.. but peace is easier said than done... Because, Human being is manufactured that way. Anger, for instance, is an inbuilt quality in human beings. A year old kid will cry in anger if you try to take his favorite teddy away from him. And, as he grows, grows the greed, jealousy, and the feeling of supremacy within him. And, the world thus is divided into pieces... Taking into consideration the current events, the world is far from peace. Be it corruption, on going wars in Iraq, Afghanistan etc., Disturbances in Kashmir, the local daily news of murders and rapes, our daily news is more about crime, corruption and war...  


 So, How can world exist in peace, when the world is actually living in pieces???


In Lao Tzu's words, ‎"If there is to be peace in the world, There must be peace in the nations. If there is to be peace in the nations, There must be peace in the cities. If there is to be peace in the cities, There must be peace between neighbors. If there is to be peace between neighbors, There must be peace in the home. If there is to be peace in the home, There must be peace in the heart."  And, if there is to be peace in the heart, there must be a mind willing to seek for it...

"Let There Be Peace on Earth and let it begin with me. Let There Be Peace on Earth, the peace that was meant to be! With God as our Father, brothers all are we. Let me walk with my brother in perfect harmony."

Amen!

My dear friend - Lost & Found

Alone I was waiting for you... Waiting for you to come back.... And you did come back...
I missed you dearly and solemnly. I remembered the first day I met you and hugged you. It was a fine evening on 15th of May, 2009. And, I just could not stop cursing the bad world outside which separated us. For a few days, I thought it was your demise and I will have to move on. I thought I lost you forever.... I never knew that every single snap and every favorite song and movie would seem like a painful reminiscence...  But my happiness knew no bounds when you came back... my friend, my guide... my dear DELL Inspiron Laptop.... !!! I lovingly named you "GRACE" and by His Grace, you did come back to me... Thank you.


Yes, Finally, My dear laptop came back to me after a long struggle... It was stolen from my room. I cursed myself for the fleeting second that I kept it reachable for the thief...  


Lessons that this episode taught me are:
1) When you lock your room, for God's sake don't put the keys in the window. It's more than foolish to do so...It's like putting your hand in the mouth of a hungry lion and asking it not to bite... 
2) S*** happens.
3) You just need to get a grip...
4) Nothing is immortal.
5) Gyaan is easier to give than to implement.
6) Don't worry of what happens next.. Even if nothing happens, at least you'll get experience..  (kyon darein Zindagi Mein Kya Hoga, Kuch Na Hoga To Tajruba Hoga)
7) The above point might sound like optimistic nonsense, but it is not. And, yes.. I still support the 5th point. ;)
8) Police and Court proceedings take a lot of time... you just need to have patience. (You might be wondering how police and court came into picture... Yes, the thief was caught by the police with my laptop bag and its belongings. When I went to the police station to take my belongings, I was told that I have to hire an advocate to claim that it's mine.)
9) You might want to kick the Judge and ask him "Are you NUTS???", when the only question he asks to give release orders is "What do you call laptop in Telugu?" and delays your case because you are clueless of what he is asking... I mean, how on earth is it a related question?.. Was he trying o be funny? It's not funny and that too when you are waiting for around 5 hrs, outside a magistrate court (which resembled more of a fish market) for a Lady to call your advocate's name and your name in a rather grumpy voice!! So... You might want to kick him... but you cannot! because he is the "honourable judge" and calling him nuts would be "contempt of court".
10) You always rely on friends and family. Nothing much you can do without their support. "I can do it all by myself" feeling is crushed and you need people around you, who are there for you... As the new airtel ad's song goes.... Har ek friend zaruri hotha hai.. :) :)

Ages in Marriage

Evening walks, though I go for one very rarely, are a delight. In the busy parks, you get to see children playing and shouting there sweats out, old aged people having a slow walk with serious discussions, and youngsters jogging hard to keep themselves fit. I prefer walking slowly, observing the strangers in the pleasant weather. On one such evening I encountered a couple.

He brought an ice-cream for her as she sat on the bench in the park. She took it with a big toothless smile. The smile reached her spectacled eyes.. :) He looked at her lovingly as if saying to her "Did you see happiness in my eyes??, It is nothing but reflection of your happiness, my dear!" I boomed with an unknown happiness as I framed out this sentence from their expressions. "O-How-sweet-of-them" feeling inside me reminded me of the video below...

Remember when I was young and so were you
and time stood still and love was all we knew
You were the first, so was I
We made love and then you cried
Remember when

Remember when we vowed the vows
and walked the walk
Gave our hearts, made the start, it was hard
We lived and learned, life threw curves
There was joy, there was hurt
Remember when

Remember when old ones died and new were born
And life was changed, disassembled, rearranged
We came together, fell apart
And broke each other's hearts
Remember when

Remember when the sound of little feet
was the music
We danced to week to week
Brought back the love, we found trust
Vowed we'd never give it up
Remember when

Remember when thirty seemed so old
Now lookn' back it's just a steppin' stone
To where we are,
Where we've been
Said we'd do it all again
Remember when
Remember when we said when we turned gray
When the children grow up and move away
We won't be sad, we'll be glad
For all the life we've had
And we'll remember when....

It could have been a love marriage or...an arranged marriage.. That is not important today. What remains important is, at one point of time in their lives, they were strangers.. And, today they are most important for each other... 

I was still looking at them, "ice-creams in their hands, enjoying before it melts, looking at the reflection of happiness in each other's eyes"...They are loving, they are living.... 

While coming out of the park, a few Q&A within me...
Was their journey comfortable or tiresome and frustrating?? - Well, it can be both. It could have been both... The more important question is, is the journey taking them to the destination?
"What does love mean?" Love doesn't mean anything. Love is. It is the state of existence. 
"Is love sweet or sour?"  Love is neither sweet, nor sour. When you expect it to be sweet, it turns sour and when you are willing to accept the sour love, it becomes sweet. But it is neither. 
They say with ages in marriage, love grows... because as they grow old, the desires fall off, the expectations too... they just need each other for each other... 


A life lived with love for and with your close ones is a Love story in itself...

The Tale of Bird and its Nest

There is an old tree, on the highest branch of which lays a nest. That nest was built with a lot of hard work and dedication by a bird couple, so that their two eggs can grow up comfortably. Mother bird with a heart full of love hatched its two new eggs. The Father bird guarded the nest. When the two nestlings came out, father bird used to go far in search of food and the parents fed the baby birds with their beaks. Parent birds were the only vision, only hope, only guidance for the babies.The ways of world were beyond the sight of the baby birds. 

Soon the babies had their feathers growing. They turned into fledglings now. Even though they could not fly, they hopped here and there near the nest. The mother bird watched them from behind, taking care that they are not hurt. She made loud noises, to warn the babies of the danger. Parent birds taught the baby birds how to find food and what to eat. They taught how to fly.

The baby birds are young now. They now know how to eat, and how to fly.  They were eager to move to new world, try their flight and be free now.  Parents hesitated to let them free, but knowing that they need freedom and exposure to a new world, they let the birds leave them. The first little baby bird was extremely eager to fly, It had the thoughts of the new world and was beaming with joy... It jumped from the nest and flew into the air. It was not worried about the consequence of flying so fast. It just flew by, happy and content with its freedom. The next little bird was so shy and timid. It slowly stepped out of the nest, flew to the next branch and looked at parents. They smiled and encouraged with claps of flaps. It flew away after sometime as parents showed a way to its new nest.                       

The parents looked at both of them as they flew by. They are proud of the choices that are made by their babies. But, the nest is empty now. They miss the noise in and around the nest. Only question in their minds is "Will the nest be visited often with the same love and care???"

Copy - Paste "Anyway"

Just happened to read this poem by Mother Teresa while surfing. Felt the need to share it... :)  

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.



My readers may say that it is not an "Original post",  "Copy-paste" anyway... ;) 

Complex Equations...

Remember the complex numbers in Mathematics??? The numbers which have real and imaginary part (a+bi). The methods for solving complex equations generally depend on the type of equation, both the kind of expressions in the equation and the kind of values that may be assumed by the unknowns/variables. 

Wait wait wait.... Before you stop reading further thinking that it a blog on complex equations of Maths, let me tell you that I'm not an ardent fan of Mathematics and this is surely not a mathematical blog... Its just that the general concepts that we learned in school seem fascinating when we relate it to our day to day life and understanding. 

Our life too is complex.. isn't it?? It too has both the real and imaginary part. REAL part can be understood as the GOAL, the purpose of our life and imaginary part--- perhaps, the emotions attached.. Maya as we say...

Life is simple or complex was the question in my mind. Many great people have said that Life is simple. 

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” - Confucious.

"Life is not complex. We are complex. Life is simple, and the simple thing is the right thing." - Oscar Wilde

I agreed to the quotes to much extent... But, when I think about it from another angle, I get the answer - Life is complex. How can life be simple?? God made such a HUGE universe. There are so many things to know and to understand.. The more you explore the God's creation, the more you feel that there is more to it to explore. As they say, its a journey towards infinity...  It is made up of so many components, that there is no formula and no easy answers. Every person has to make their own path through life. There is no predefined path. Life cannot be settled by hard and fast rules. The right road for one might be wrong for another. In the life's journey, we don't have sign-boards, it's not all brightly lit, it can be very bumpy at times. Then, how do we choose the direction?? What do we do, when we are at crossroads??? Isn't it sounding very complex?? 

Perhaps, it is sounding complex because evolution has equipped us with a brain which is capable of thinking more than what is actually required..;) .. the way I am thinking right now...  I may end up making it more complex, the more I think. So....shall stop here!

The only solution is "Believe that we CAN make it simple", when we feel that it is getting complicated... We need to keep on simplifying it until it gets to the END. We can make it simple by accepting the fact that we don't have control over vagaries of life. What we need is an objective, a purpose and a belief.

Coming out of the COCOON

"It's more of Brown coloured sweet water !!!", I frowned at the cup of Tea. 

"Ye tera ghar nahi hai jo tujhe Adrak wali kadak chai mile. This is Hostel (This is not your home, where you get Ginger Tea)", said Ranju quickly having her first sip.   

"There is a Tea stall nearby. Shall we go?", I asked.

"Nahi Didi.... Have you seen any girl having Tea there???", asked Preeti - The most girlie kind of a girl I ever met.

"No... but...", I thought for a while.

"Let's be the first ones to do that.", Ranju completed my sentence.

So... We went near the Tea-stall. Somewhere around 10 customers (all men) were there. 

"Bhaiyya, Teen Chai", I said. ... We felt that everyone there is staring at us with amusement. "Parcel", continued Ranju adjusting my request. 

We get the comfort zone only when we can't be singled out in crowd. Don't know why, but we girls (specially Indian girls)  tend to think more in this way.. We are perhaps to some extent brought up that way. We have to think a lot on "What will others think ?, Does it look good?" 

Going for shopping alone?? - Ahem... Is it that urgent? Let me wait for some company. 

Going for a movie alone --- AAh! that's completely insane...

Having Lunch/Dinner in a restaurant alone - Better I take parcel.

Wanna catch a bus? Gotto run?? - Most of the girlie girls prefer to wait for the next bus and walk in their standard speed. 

Want to play an outdoor game - Again, you seek for company, a proper park ( you don't really appreciate the thought of playing in the Gali.) Guys can play Gali cricket, but gals cant play in Gali (that's an unsaid rule). We all know that most of the girls after teenage give up playing outdoor games (there's  some exception, though). They loose interest because most of the times they don't get the right company... and it is hard to get such company in such society. 

I know some of my friends, who seriously depend upon their boyfriends / Brothers for the smallest of the daily needs that come across. We have this thick shell of the so called protection around us that coming out of it is a big deal. You get so much accustomed to it that you don't feel anything wrong in it, and in fact, you start liking it. 

I'm not talking about "Naari Shakti Zindabad" stuff. I'm not arguing that girls and boys are equally strong physically and mentally. 

I just want to say that women of 21st century should come out of the cocoon of stereotypes she is confined to, to some extent, if not fully. Come out from it slowly and steadily, if not at once. I just am pondering that to have a single cup of tea in a tea stall, you are bound to think.. WHY?? Is it because of the society we live in or is it my own "inside the box" thinking???

NAGAVALLI.

Hang On! Hang On! If you are guessing that it is about the upcoming Venkatesh starring, Sequel of Chandramukhi, Telugu Movie - Nagavalli, you are absolutely WRONG!!

It is about my friend - my childhood friend - my first friend after I understood the meaning of the word "friend".

I was in 1st standard when I met her. She was my classmate- rather say, Bench-mate. She was extremely cute with dimpled cheeks and dimpled chin. We had companionship of nearly 6 years after that. She was the Ishaan Awasthi (TZP Kid) of my class. Least interested in studies. She was always ready to donate her things... pencils and erasers and even her copies!!! I remember how we used her copies as roughly as we could to play!
Her home was very near to our school; she used to come by Tanga- the Ghoda Gaadi (Horse-Cart). On the other hand, mine was too far and I travelled by school-bus. We would always invite each other to our homes ( I knowing that it is anyhow not going to happen, our parents wont allow).  Relating an interesting incident below, when I was in 1st standard!!!

One fine day, she told me that she wants to come to my home and entered my school bus along with me. Now, how could I say NO.?? I was happy... but was afraid about my mom's reaction. She told me that she has informed her brother. So.. The bus started.. In every two minutes she would ask "When will we reach your home?" She never had such a long journey it seemed. At bus stop, Mom was waiting for us. I gave my bag to Mom. 

Mom asked, "Who is she???".  
"My friend!!! She wanted to visit our home..." , I said.
"I told her that my home is very far.. but she already told her brother... so... I .." I continued justifying that I didn't invite her. 
My sweet mom smiled and didn't say anything and I thanked God (I don't really know if I knew what thanking God was, but I'm sure I took a sigh of relief). Mom prepared gulab jamuns that day for us. I gave her my frock to wear, and we played that evening.. extremely happily...I wished her home was near to mine...  Dad came back from office. He looked at my mom and asked with gesture about her. Dad went to Bedroom after listening to the whole story, not bothering much. 
My paternal uncle came after some time and he was astonished to see such a small child, and.. kind of.. bashed my parents for not bothering to take her back to her home. He was worried that her parents will be worried by this time. 
"She is hardly 6 years, what will you do if she cries in the night for her mom????" , He asked my parents. "Give me her bag, I'll drop her now.", he said.
"I will go tomorrow", she cried. 
I too cried, but did not dare to say a word before my uncle. 
My uncle took her in his arms and lovingly said "Your mom would be worried, Lets go to home". 
He asked her "Where is your home?".  
"Ummm.... Uncle... There is a temple and a BIG Tree... There are so many birds on it. They do "chi -chi" all the time. My home is near to that place", she replied innocently, wiping her tears. You can guess what reaction one must be having after hearing this..  :D
When they reached school, the watchman told that her parents were so much worried that they have already registered a  police complaint. Somehow, she reached her home safely that night, with my uncle's strong will. We came to know later that she was a single child in her family, and had no brother. 

This small tale is remembered again and again in my home, till date... :) 

Years passed by, and we still were best of friends. Her only problem was studies. I remember another incident, I still remember it with much detail...It goes back to sometime, when I was in 4th standard.

We were asked to submit H.W copies , my homework was complete, but my copy was not covered with the Brown sheet, which was a MUST. I was afraid.. As always, she readily donated a brown sheet. She removed it from her own copy and wrapped it neatly on mine. Erased her name and wrote mine. 
I asked her "How about yours?". 
She said with recklessness "My homework is anyhow not completed. No worries..". 
I submitted my copy happily and... she was punished. She was hit by scale and big tears rolling down her cheeks. I felt so bad, and  realized that I could have helped her complete her homework, rather than taking that sheet to save myself. I felt guilty, but I never expressed it, and ironically, I scolded her for not completing homework.

Slowly, my circle of friends changed. I started being more with my kind of students with whom I can discuss studies, with whom I could play knowledge oriented games apart from the regular childish 'hide and seek' sort of games.. I got the feeling  of "not my kinds" for her.  The innocence of friendship was gradually decreasing. With maturity, we start choosing friends.. Friendship no more happens automatically. We start looking at the characteristics: How good is she/he in studies, how one dresses up, how well he/she speaks in English... interests, values, ethics, etc.  


I was now in 9th standard.. and she was still in 7th Standard. After spending 2 years of unsuccessful attempts in 6th standard, she was somehow, promoted to 7th standard, with much difficulty. We were in different classes now, and obviously, we became distant with just a few hello, hi's and Byes..
That day, I had to do some decoration in our class. I needed some colours. She appeared in corridor and I casually told her about the decoration stuff. Again, she was ready with some colours, and offered them. 
I asked "How come you have all the colours?".  
"Its 'Drawing' Exam today", she replied.
"How can you give this to me??? It's your EXAM. Keep it for your-self. I'll get from else-where." I refused to take.
"I will have option of Pencil drawing, will opt for it. No worries..." she enforced me to take it.
I finally took 2-3 colours out of the bunch and thanked her.


That was the last time I met her. I never saw her again. Some said that she got married. Some said that she changed her school. I wished I could meet her one last time and say thanks. I wished I could do something for her. 
I tried to find her in orkut and facebook, when I joined these sites.. in vain. 
She has always been in my childhood memories that I cherish. 
I remember the way we played, the way we ate together, the way I scolded her, the way she cried when I was hurt... I never admired her qualities then. In fact, I never observed them. When I brood over these incidents, I realize that she taught me few great things, which school and studies can never teach one. She showed me unconditional love with the tiny concerns and tiny things of school-life. 
I feel lucky to have some true friends in my life, for whom I have this 'unconditional affection'. Friends... whom I accept as they are. 

The Spinning Arrows

"8 more hours".. "6".... "4".... "2"... "Half an hour more"... "Youhuu!!! Shift Hand-off. Week-off". I constantly looked at the spinning arrows in my watch (which seemed to be too slow). Not that I was very tired and not that I worked too hard...not that I have anything special to do this week-end... But I was waiting for a break.... Nine hours at work seemed to be unending...  "Why the time is running too slowly" has been my thought from quite some days, now. 

Contrary to the above thought, sometimes, I feel like time flies by. It seems just a few days back that I graduated from college and came to Hyderabad... and, now... its already been 4 years and 1 month that I'm staying here. 

Days go by and turns as months, months into years and years finally become our whole life.

Time takes its own time. Its never fast and never slow... Time is always on Time... ;)

One of my favourite childhood serial Mahabharat portrays time very well. Time says:

"Main Samay hoon. Mahabharat ke patra ye nahi jaante ki jo ho raha hai, wo kyun ho raha hai. Main Jaantha hun, kyunki main samay hun. main sab dekh raha tha, sab dekh raha hun aur sab kuch dekhta rahunga. Chup Chaap... Kyunki main Hastakshep nahi kar sakta, na hi aashirwaad de sakta hu... aur na hi shraap de sakta hu" ( I am Time. The characters of the epic, don't know, that why it is happening. I know. Because, I am Time. I have been and will be a silent spectator, because I cannot judge, I cannot bless and I cannot punish)

It is amazing to note that the reflections of these spinning arrows could turn into  musings on life. :)

The Spider's Web

"Welcome to XYZ Broadband services" (someone told me that we should not use brand names in public.. SIGH!.... )

"Please press Star to continue" 

* Pressed

"Dear Customer, Your Account No is four nine two .... To confirm, please press 1"

1 Pressed

"For technical assistance, please press 1"

1 pressed

"Kindly be online, while we transfer you to the next available executive. Your call may be recorded for internal training and assessment purpose"

Irritating music starts...  After some time...

"All our executives are busy. Kindly be online. Your estimate hold time is ONE minute"

Irritating music starts again.. After sometime..

"All our executives are still busy. Kindly be online. Your estimate hold time is ONE minute"

==============================================================

Just imagine, how must I be feeling to hear this again and again..

I was drifiting along, like a log of wood in water, for quite some time now. Life had ceased to be eventful. Neither was I progressing in any sphere of my life, nor was there a regression. It was the same monotonicity, day in and day out.  Plus NO NET CONNECTION makes me feel disconnected... Plus 6 day working... plus as mentioned above "All our executives are busy - from Internet provider". 

"WORLD WIDE WEB" has become the need of the day. And it has become one of the strands in our web of lives... In these thoughts, the philosophical ME comes out. From world wide web, my thoughts weave to the web of life.

How interconnected things are in life... Everything is connected to everything else in an infinite Web of relationships. There are these infinite connections, like the one between me and the farmer who grew the rice I eat.

So, when we want to walk in our path through life with the intent of growing our spirit, we must do so with the understanding that we cannot do so in isolation. Only by working simultaneously to balance and develop all of our aspects and working to promote the growth and development of the energy that surrounds us, can we hope to achieve our maximum potential in this lifetime. And to attain this potential, we should be aware that it often requires a series of zigzag stages, each unfolding into the next. We never know where those first uncertain, even shaky, steps will lead us, but we don’t really need to know that when we start out. We just need to accept that there will be some point in the future when we will look back and see that we have new capacities, new boundaries, new courage, and a whole new worldview.

"Although it is made of thin, delicate strands, the web is not easily broken. However a web gets torn everyday by the insects that kick around in it, the spider must build it when it gets full of holes. " - E.B.White

THORN BUSH has ROSES.. :)

Coming back from office on a rainy day, I was waiting for auto. "Auto... Auto... JNTU" I screamed. "NO", he said arrogantly. Few more autos went by without even replying. Another Auto came "JNTU...".  He was kind enough to reply, "Madam, no one will go to JNTU today. Rain water has blocked that route. You have to take another route". I was already wet with the merciless rain. "Why didn't I take umbrella", I cursed myself and was looking for any kind lady who would offer to share her umbrella with me. Alas! there was none .... I was worried about my mobile being wet...  I ran towards the other corner of the road to check for other route. "Auto... Miyap..", Before I could say miyapur, seven people grabbed it and this auto ran away with flooded candidates on it. Few more autos went away that way. After half an hour or so, a bus came "MIYAPUR" on its board; overflowing with CROWD. I somehow managed to enter it. I cursed everything on the planet, starting from rain to roads to auto drivers to car owners to the crowded bus and to my company which has not provided transport facility. Reached my room after 2 and a half hrs of journey. 

I was tired and was still cursing... 

Bed time, before I sleep, is the time when I tend to flashback the day for once. Flashback told me:

 "You reached office at 11.30 am, 2 hours late; no one complained; very few people have the luxury to reach office that late; just after 2 hrs session, you went for lunch- You had a tasty Biryani with Gulaab Jamun; many people cannot afford these meals. You enjoyed half an hour near the lake in your company premises. It was all so beautiful and pleasant; Very few companies in India are such well built. You went back to work and enjoyed the training period and had fun with your colleagues. Coming back from office the hunt for auto started..... You cursed everything that was going wrong, but never blessed anything that was going right."

I reminded myself that I should thank God for what has been given to me. I questioned myself for not being able to see the positivity in things.. Why?? Why am I becoming so complaining day by day??? This is not the usual me... If I cant do anything, I should not complain and If I complain, I should have something to do for it. 

This life is full of so many things and yet so devoid of many others. The more we get, the more we want. There is this endless chain of wants... "I want good friends, good work, good workplace, good amount of money, nice food, nice place to live in, nice transport, etc, etc. "  We keep on complaining for what we have or for what we don't have. There is no period, no full stop!!

Instead of complaining that the rosebush is full of thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses.

I am in my trials to come out of this complaining attitude and to get into the mood called POSITIVITY! Are you??

P.S : I initially titled it as "A figment from the lake of thoughts", but later changed it to "Thorn Bush has ROSES" upon suggestion from one of my friends. Because, this title gives the gist of my post. Received this title with thanks... :)

Mission - Water CAN!!

It was 9 AM in the morning. Half bucket of water was available in wash room. Mom said, "I'm waiting since 5 AM for water. Please go and arrange some water cans.".. New thing for me!!... I said "I think Dad can arrange... Let me call. He is in office. He must be knowing".  " No need beta... There's a tea shop in the next lane. Ask him where we can get water cans", Mom said. But, the impatient ME was already on call.

"Hello, Dady, There's no water in home. Relatives too are there. Veena Aunty and Sharma Aunty may come in next 2 hours for satsang. what should I do? Where should I call? Do you have any phone number to call and arrange water??" I was speaking NON-STOP.

Dad with his patient voice asked "Entii ?? " (What?)

"Huh!! O Dady.. No Water. Please arrange", I said, this time in a shorter version.

"Oh... Hmmm... I had one contact of a water supplier.... Hmmm.... But.... I changed my mobile... That number is lost... Hmmm... Let me check..." 

After a long pause, he continued "Do one thing...There's a tea shop in the next lane. Ask him where we can get water cans"

"Okay! So, Audio replay in different voice this time", I thought and cursed myself for not listening to the first voice.

I brushed my teeth with one mug of water.  I said to myself, "Kindly adjust..." 

@ Tea Shop - "Bhaiyya, yahan paani kahan milega?" (Brother, where can I get water??)  He gave me a strange look and looked at the water bottle beside his Tea can. As guessed by his strange looks, he didn't know.
I saw one of my neighbours was passing by.  
"Namaste Uncle"
"Hello.. So, how's your vacation going?"
"Yeah..Good. Uncle, can you tell me, where can I get water cans here. Some water scarcity at home", I came to the point directly.
"Don't know. I'll inform you, in case I see any water seller", he said with a big smile.
"Thank you.. (but I wonder if you find him in an hour):, I thought.

I came back home and told the same story to mom. My peddananagaru (paternal uncle), who was listening to this, joined me in my hunt for water. After roaming in three to four lanes and asking almost every shopper and vendor, we finally got the address of the water supplier. 


"We need 6 water cans", I said.
"Bhara hua ya khali?" (Empty one or filled one?), he asked. 
"Of course, filled ones please!!" I said with the obviousness of the matter and gave our address with a sigh of relief. 
While coming back it started drizzling. "WATER - Ah.. What a relief!!", I smiled. Peddananagaru smiled back and said, "No wonder if a few years down the line, we buy the air we breathe!". 
Water is one of the most basic of all needs - And yet, we take water for granted. We waste water needlessly and don't realize that clean water is a very limited resource.


Save water, each drop is precious!
Please go through few tips to save water in the below link.
http://www.pubarticles.com/article-five-aspects-to-save-water-at-home-1251451885.html

The Indian Idle

Yes, who else it is, but me! And, what would a typical Indian Idle do? Yes, It's watching the Idiot Box - TV. ( Chatting, orkutting FB and Blogging on a parallel track)

The average Indian family is hooked to the TV shows which start from 7.30 PM and continue till 10.30 PM. After a long time, surfing the TV channels, I chose the below serials/ programs some of which I love to hate while watching.. ;)

1) Balika Vadhu - This half an hour program has less than one line of story. It begins with Anandi's cry and ends with the same. This serial was started with the motive to kinda eradicate child marriages in society. But, now it seems that the serial is encouraging it!! "Eeh! This should be banned", I say, every time I watch. 

2) Na aana iss des me LAADO - Eeh... The lesser I talk about it, the better. I change the channel, as soon as I see any of the character on TV. My mom insists "Laado aa raha hai, channel mat badlo". "Not again! Mom.. PLEASE! This serial is introducing cruelty in those SAASs who are not cruel... It shows the ways on how to be a BAD person... Don't watch this. So much grossness involved! Yak!" I start my lecture.... Mom says "Ok! I will watch the repeat telecast, with a sigh!"... SIGH!!!!

The list of daily soaps is unending, Bidaai, Behane, Sasuraal genda phool, Uttaran... etc, etc, etc. . Almost all serials have same plots. A cruel (saas) mother-in-law, a dutiful bahu (Bahu - Daughter in Law), another competing grey-shade bahu.. You can identify easily who is the villain in the story with the help of.. 1) Make-up and, 2)Back-ground music, when the person enters. Second marriages, illegal relationships, coming out from the mouth of death," "Pati is parmeshwar" (Husband is God) type dialogues" are so common in all these serials that its ODD to even see.

Now, coming to my favourite programs... 

1) Indian Idol - Music is something which has always attracted me. and, so has this program. The punch lines of the judges and the melodrama within too is interesting... Becomes irritating at times when unworthy candidates get more votes... I'm happy! Finally, Tia is out of Indian Idol 5. 

2) CID - I'm watching this serial since my childhood. I love to laugh at the comedy within this serial. The peculiar style of ACP Pradyuman with his waving right hand near his right portion of his head and a raised left eye-brow with the dialogue "Daya, pata lagao ki akhir chakkar kya hai!!!" or the only dialogue by Fredericks "Sir!!! Ye tho Marr gaya!!" is worth LOL. 

( Those who haven't seen CID, it is a series of detective stories, out of which 99% of the stories have the same ending - Inspector Abhijeet or Daya slaps the suspect and he agrees, "ahuhuhu" (that's a cry and not a laugh), "Han! maine hi khoon kiya.. Mujhe badla lena tha badla.. ahuhuhu")

3) Dance programs like boogie woogie, chak dhoom dhoom : small kids dancing look very cute and is worth watching. Again as I said above, Music attracts me...

4) India TV News channel : You can laugh out loud with the news in this channel. It always airs news with the content of "chamatkari dhongi baba" types... Now, this news channel has the capacity to show the oldest of the news as breaking news. Take Dhoni's marriage.. For 3 days, the channel was busy in investigating, 1) why he did not invite his fellow players. 2) where will he go for his honeymoon 3) with how many girls was he having an affair before his marriage and so on and so forth... "Are bhai! Give a break... let him live"

Ok Ok... Enough of these things, the list though is unending! I know, I have bored you enough for the day. 

I certify myself as the "Indian Idle" of this month, by watching TV at my best after 4 long years!! Thanks to those, who read my unworthy post. Wanna kill your time??? Read my post ...if you don't have TV by any chance... ;)

Mixed Bag of Emotions.. :) :D :O :(

"Aa gaye Beta, chutti leke??" is the common question every one asks when I reach home from Hyderabad. Hyderabad - My karma bhoomi, so far! And it is always a pleasant experience to say "Yes!!! I came on vacation." The love with which everyone receives makes you feel very special. and, I simply love this ;)
On a long vacation, this time, it feels great. 3 days passed and I'm loving the freedom of no work, mom's morsels , TV, phone calls from friends, waiting for Sunday to meet friends. It's all so exciting...
I feel the same anxiety which I felt before joining my first company. How would the place be? Will I be able to make good friends? How the work will be? Will I get to learn new things? when will I be transferred to Delhi/NCR? Will I be transferred at all at first place? Chalo, chodo bhai... abhi tho ek mahina ghar baithe maze karte hain, fir sochte hain....
And, with all this excitement, anxiety and happiness of being at my home, I have this slight twinge of leaving my present company. I never realised how and when I fell in love with my company, my colleagues and my workplace. They say, Idle mind is devils workshop, and so has become mine... now, whenever I sit idle, I think "what must be going on now at office.. ?" I get funny answers and I laugh at them and start smiling. One such answer:
Bunny must be eating the coconut with right hand and ice-cream melting with the heat surrounding.... Hehehe .


PS- I'm sorry for not giving description of the last line.. Those associated with me at my workplace shall understand it... ;) 
The purpose of writing this blog is just nothing. No wisdom Quotes, nothing preachy and nothing moralistic and idealistic like my other posts....
Its thinking out loud... straight from the heart!!!