Mesmerising Memoirs and My Ramblings

There is something special about memoirs. I realized lately that I love reading memoirs when compared to fiction, and in fiction, fiction narrated in the form of memoirs. Mitch albom's "Tuesdays with Morrie" and other novels, Shantanu naidu's " I came upon a light house". Recent addition to the list is "Born a crime" by Trevor Noah. I tend to like memoirs more than autobiogrpahies. Afterall, nobody can have their entire life interesting. It is the slices of the life, the most interesting parts of the author's life that connects with the reader. Memoirs cherry-pick the most significant, interesting or transformative events, making them more engaging. 

 

One is daily journalling, which is basically reflecting on the events that occurred during the day ( one or two days old reflection) . And the other is when you go down the memory lane.. many years back...  I am now doing some random rambling on the later one. 

When we look back at our past after many years, we are, in fact, two different selves. One is the person who was left behind somewhere in the memories of a bygone time, and the other is the mind that is observing all of it objectively. One is what is visible, and the other is what is unfolding within the mind. Isn't this awareness of two selves both liberating and unsettling, as we try to make sense of who we are and where we are going?

We can never quite grasp this play of fleeting time and past memories. We try to gather what has slipped away, while remaining detached from what is flowing in the present. As we move forward, we end up somewhere else—not just far from our origin, but also very far from ourselves. So far that when we try to look back and understand ourselves, it feels almost impossible. Even our memories gradually begin to fade away.

When we journal with this awareness of two selves—past and present—it seems like we are embracing this duality, almost like writing our own evolving memoir. This awareness adds depth to how we understand both memory and identity. 

Do you resonate with this thought or are you thinking "Akhir kehna kya chahte ho?" 😅

The Art of Racing in the Rain

Despite not being a dog or car enthusiast, I found the book captivating. Its unique perspective, storytelling, and lessons on resilience and navigating life's challenges made it a truly insightful experience.

"The Art of Racing in the Rain" by Garth Stein is unique. It's told from the point of view of a dog named Enzo. It’s a touching story about family, love, and life's struggles, seen through the eyes of a dog with the soul of a philosopher.

Some notable quotes from the book :

"So much of language is unspoken. So much of language is compromised of looks and gestures and sounds that are not words. People are ignorant of the vast complexity of their own communication."

"To be a champion, you must have no ego at all. You must not exist as a separate entity. You must give yourself over to the race. You are nothing if not for your team, your car, your shoes, your tires. Do not mistake confidence and self-awareness for egotism."

"Learn to listen! I beg of you. Pretend you are a dog like me and listen to other people rather than steal their stories."

"Here’s why I will be a good person. Because I listen. I cannot speak, so I listen very well. I never interrupt, I never deflect the course of the conversation with a comment of my own."

"It makes one realize that the physicality of our world is a boundary to us only if our will is weak; a true champion can accomplish things that a normal person would think impossible."

"Such a simple concept, yet so true: that which we manifest is before us; we are the creators of our own destiny. Be it through intention or ignorance, our successes and our failures have been brought on by none other than ourselves."

“There is no dishonor in losing the race,” Don said. “There is only dishonor in not racing because you are afraid to lose.”

"A winner, a champion, will accept his fate. He will continue with his wheels in the dirt. He will do his best to maintain his line and gradually get himself back on the track when it is safe to do so. Yes, he loses a few places in the race. Yes, he is at a disadvantage. But he is still racing. He is still alive. The race is long. It is better to drive within oneself and finish the race behind the others than it is to drive too hard and crash."

Highly recommend it for anyone looking for a quick thought provoking read.

Where the mind is without fear

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high

Where knowledge is free

Where the world has not been broken up into fragments

By narrow domestic walls

Where words come out from the depth of truth

Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection

Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way

Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit

Where the mind is led forward by thee

Into ever-widening thought and action

Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

- Rabindranath Tagore

I remember this iconic poem since childhood. During our very long assembly time at school, this was one of the poems that we recited daily. At that time, I think I didn't realise the power of these lines. What a powerful plea to the divine to awaken the country to this vision of freedom!! I am now glad that I had this experience in school and realise how it had impact on my younger subconscious self, even if full understanding and appreciation came later.

It's interesting how our perspectives and understanding of literature can evolve over time. As we grow and experience life, we can appreciate the depth and complexity of poems like this one. The lines that once seemed simple or abstract can now resonate with us on a deeper level.

Do you have a similar memory from Childhood? Any poem or story which is imprint in your mind from childhood? Do care to share with your younger ones and friends. You never know, when a small spark enlightens the other life. 

A Lesson learned at 30K feet - Breathe, Reflect, Repeat

I grasped for breath as I reached airport and rushed towards the counter for check-in counter. "How could I be so careless?!", I cursed myself. It was quite a run, when I realised that the flight is at 5:40 pm and not 6:40 pm. I ran towards the flight as the last call for passengers was being announced. I just didnt care that people were giving me weird looks when I was running fanatically while grasping for breath. I breathed a sigh of relief when I entered the flight. Took my seat, wiped the sweat on my face, took a few long breaths. I checked my mobile phone which was about to die with 10% battery. "10% -S××××!!!", I cursed myself again!  I messaged the important people that I have safely boarded by flight and switched it off, as i would need the remaining % battery when I reach the destination.

Switiching off mobile sometimes is a liberation. Feeling disconnected with the OCD of looking at mobile is a blessing... in disguise... Opened my diary and wrote 2 times - How could I be so careless!!! ,and ruminated over this for the rest of the duration of the flight.

We do this all the time! Dont we? Having worked in IT operations for years now, I know the costs of being careless. One wrong click on a production environment can have an inexplicable huge impact.   And yet it happens sometimes. 

We need to develop that awareness and attention. You dont become mindful overnight and it doesnt come easily. Like all skills, being mindful requires practice.

Some of the ways to develop this consciousness are below:

1. One thing at a time - We constantly juggle with mutiple things at a time. We boast of being multi-taskers. But the fact is that you cannot be conscious of multiple things at once. In this episode here, I was multi talsking and I didnt prioritize checking the flight details till the last moment. You need  to pay deliberate attention to each thought and feeling that arises in your experience. Practice developing awareness of just one thing at any given moment.

2. Acceptance -  Observe the moment with acceptance and love without being judgemental. Temporarily, let go of the need to change, fight, or deny any aspects of your experience. Let it be. Observe and accept.

3. Focus on Now - There is nothing you can do to magically alter the past. Let go of past and future… they are illusions.  Focus on Present to change the future by choosing right things now.

4. Journal your experience - Once you begin to realistically notice, describe, and accept your present-moment experience just the way that it is, you will have the power to make new choices and develop new behavioral patterns.. which is what I am doing now by writing this post. :)

5. Meditate - try to disconnect with thoughts everyday for a few minutes. This gives more clarity every day.

Lets try to consciously attempt to improve the awareness, attentiveness and carefulness.

Until next time...

Persistence and Flexibility

Last week marked my 18th year in this incredible IT industry.  Reflecting on the years that have passed, I realise how every moment has been an amazing learning opportunity. Here are my musings on these learnings beyond the technical aspects:

Has it always been fulfilling ? Perhaps, Not.

There are some days when I might have cribbed about the job, about the coworkers, about increment, etc.  But in my view, the key is Persistence and Self awareness. 

Persistence is self-discipline in action. The belief that the events that take place through out one's life are conducive to ones elevation and that there is no good or bad event, helps us find opportunity in all circumstances, for us to be assertive.

Self Awareness is knowing that we become unstoppable when we work on things that cannot be taken away - our mindset, our character, personality, authenticity, integrity and our entire being. 

We must keep assessing inner wisdom and let it guide us towards growth.

The other aspect is flexibility. Flexibility is often seen as a weakness. However, in my view it is not only a tool for survival but also allows you to achieve goals in the constantly changing world.

At first glance, you may feel that persistence and flexibility are paradoxical. Because, while persistence implies to sticking to a plan, being rigid, and maintaining a consistent approach, flexibility implies adaptability, being open to change and adjusting the plans as needed.  But when you think about it at a deeper level, you will wonder how interconnected these two qualities are and how they complement each other when balanced correctly. 

This reminds me of the classic fable  about the big tree and a plant. The story goes like this:

A big, strong tree stood tall and proud, often looking down on the smaller, seemingly weaker plants around it. Among these was a small plant that the tree considered insignificant. The tree boasted about its strength and ability to withstand any force of nature.

One day, a fierce storm hit. The strong winds blew relentlessly, and the big tree, despite its strength, struggled to stay upright. Eventually, the tree was uprooted and fell. However, the small plant, which could bend and sway with the wind, yet firm on the roots survived the storm unscathed.

The moral of the story is that flexibility and humility can sometimes be more advantageous than sheer strength and pride. Those who can adapt to changing circumstances often survive and thrive, even when faced with great challenges. The persistence of the plant to remain fixed on the roots and the flexibility of the branches to bend and adapt to the winds helped the plant to navigate the obstacles and be successful.

Survival of the fittest

I was surfing on youtube when I came across a video where birds were plucking the hair of the deer. 

It was a cute video showing the deer enjoying a free hair cut while the birds collected raw material to build their nests. This got me thinking. 

Over the years we have had a narrow belief that the survival of the fittest means that the strongest always wins. "Fittest" meant having the competitive advantage over others, winning over others. But in essence, Nature teaches us that  "Fittest" are often those who can coexist and support the health of their community.

"Fittest" can mean the most effective collaborators, those who create independent web of ecosystem. 

There are many such examples in nature of such symbiotic relationships. Food for thought - Are we intune with nature in this aspect? What can we do differently to cooperate and evolve within our ecosystems and with our fellow beings?

Signing off with this thought.

Love & Peace.

Navigating Disappointments with Grace and Gratitude

As appraisal cycle results approach, it's natural for some individuals to feel a sense of unfairness or disappointment, especially if they perceive their efforts haven't been adequately recognized or rewarded.It is easy to slip into bitterness. But thats a trap!! Avoid this trap if you are smart but disillusioned. Succumbing to bitterness only perpetuates a cycle of negativity that ultimately hinders personal growth and fulfillment.

The most bitter people are the smart people who are not as successful as they thought they should be, because they feel that they are shining and the world should fall at their feet, but it doesnt workout that way. 

I dont say that you should not disagree with the outcome. It's important to acknowledge and validate those feelings of disagreement or frustration. However, how we choose to respond to those feelings is what ultimately shapes our experience and future outcomes. While it's understandable to feel disappointed or even upset, allowing those emotions to fester into bitterness can be detrimental both personally and professionally.

The key lies in recognizing that success is often subjective and multifaceted. While one may excel in certain areas, they may face challenges or setbacks in others. Moreover, success is rarely instantaneous and often requires perseverance, resilience, and a willingness to adapt to changing circumstances.

By cultivating an attitude of gratitude, individuals can shift their focus from what they lack to what they have accomplished and experienced. This mindset not only fosters a greater sense of fulfillment and contentment but also opens doors to new opportunities and perspectives.

Embracing humility and acknowledging the contributions of others can foster stronger relationships and collaboration, ultimately leading to greater success and satisfaction in the long run. The picture above summarizes how gratitude can be practiced and its benefits.

A drop a day - practice gratitude every single day. Attittude of gratitude takes us long way.

Love & Peace!